Thoughts about ‘ 礼品之路’ or ‘The Way of the Gift’ have been & are brewing in my being, as we (my family & I) settle, for a while unknown, into life in Jiamusi, in the North of China.
The new environment.
And perhaps my reading as I study ‘happiness’, all contribute to these thoughts.
This morning, as I sit-down to write again, I’m surprised to notice that I’ve already shared five posts on 礼品之路 or ‘The Way of the Gift’.
礼品之路 is all about happiness.
I’m coming to believe it is the Way to happiness.
The 1st post was simply titled: 礼品之路
The second post was titled: 礼品之路 – The Gift of Enough
The third post elaborated on ‘enough’, simply saying: 礼品之路 – More about ‘the Gift of Enough’
Then we took a step backwards, to consider ‘being & becoming’: 礼品之路 – ‘The Gift of Being & Becoming’
In that post my thoughts went more to ‘the gift of being’. An immense gift which speaks to our value. Our collective value. And our preciousness as exquisite individuals.
Then I shared some ideas, more specifically about ‘the Gift of Becoming’, with a post called: 礼品之路 – The Gift of Becoming.
This past week, in my reading & our experiences I’ve been drawn to think about ‘being known’.
How there is immense happiness when we are known.
Immense absence of happiness when we’re not.
To be known.
Our dreams & hopes & dissapointments.
Our deepest desires.
Our sordid secrets.
And to be loved, even as we are completely known, not despite of who we are, but exactly because of who we are – this, I believe, is something every one of us need.
In our pursuit of happiness.
We hope our parents will know us.
And as we emerge into adulthood we believe our friends, who are as adrift as us, know us.
We form what we believe to be deep relationships.
Falling in love.
Committing to lives shared till death comes between us.
We make more friends.
We share experiences.
We bear children.
Or adopt them.
As we hope to be known.
For who we are.
Not despite of it.
And yet, we live aware, that it is exceptional & exquisite to be known.
And to be loved, even when we are completely known.
And so we hide.
If not entirely.
Then always to an extent.
That if we are known, we will not be loved.
Hoping that in our careful illusion we will solicit something which resembles at least a semblance of love.
And some of those life long commitments die.
To be replaced by new ones.
And parents reject.
And children grow-up.
And we resort to control.
Trying to bind people to us.
By making them dependants.
By robbing them of freedom.
By creating greater deceit.
Spinning a cocoon of apparitions.
Making it impossible for us to be known, as we desperately try & hope for exactly that.
To be known.
Without a doubt.
For exactly who we are.
And happiness illudes us.
And life is a burden.
Along 礼品之路 (The Way of the Gift) we receive the gift of being known.
For who we are.
In the Poetry of one of Israel’s Kings he expressed it beautifully.
King David describes our Origin.
He speaks of our Origin weaving us into being in our mother’s womb.
About our Origin knowing us, completely, even before we came into being.
This is the King who had many wives & many more mistresses.
The King who killed to take another man’s wife.
The King whose desperation to be known, issolated him.
Except his Origin.
Sometimes we are fortunate.
And in this life we receive the Gift of meeting someone who loves us, even when knowing who we are.
And the Gift of being bold & brave enough to divulge ourselves completely.
Without hesitation or fear.
And to know that someone too.
And to love that someone, exactly because of who they are.
It is rare, I see.
And I am grateful that the Gift has measured it for me.
Perhaps the King known as our Origin’s friend, received it too, in the woman for who he killed.
But the Gift begins, where King David’s poetry speaks.
In realizing that we are known.
By (s)He who wove us together in an immense act of creation, or co-creation, when two people attempted to know each other deeply, mingling body & soul with passion & desire, as a new exquisite synergy of body & soul is brought into being.
Known, as we could never hope or imagine to be known.
Not unto judgement.
Our shared stories of our beginning talks of a time when we were aware of our Origin’s knowledge.
And then it changed.
The first man, in man & woman, hiding.
Perhaps with a shame which is now ours collectively too.
All the while there is a second man.
Along this Way.
Making a way.
So that we may see the shame & isolation was the illusion.
And we had been known.
And will be known.
And are known.
For who we are.
May you come to see this.
You are known.
And loved for everything you are.
For along 礼品之路 (The Way of the Gift) we are not our actions.
Or our failures.
We are our being.
Deeply rooted in the Being.
From eternity to eternity.
And as you discover this new Way.
Perhaps it will be measured for you as well, as it was for that poetic King, to be known, not only by your Origin, which in itself is enough, but also by another who comes from our Origin.
Becoming a little more like (s)He.
Being, mingled, into more than we’ve ever known.
And happiness received, beyond hope.
And over time the cocoon may fall away.
Alowing us to stand naked again, before ourselves & (s)He.